Tuesday, 18 November 2008


At the side of my blog you will notice the Feedjit Traffic Feed. I only put it there to see if anyone actually came to my blog. I had set up a traffic feed thingy previously which despite the comments I was receiving steadfastly told me that zero people visited, ever.

Imagine my surprise then at the variety of visitors. Yesterday, someone from the 'Central District' came looking for something. I know not what. I am intrigued. Where is the Central District? Is it near Birmingham, or is it one of the old USSR states? There seem to be so many. Fascinating.

Someone from Albania searching for info on the BVC. IS that for real?

Also Ireland seems to have found me in the last few days, as has the good old USofA. To be honest, I don't know if you can go to prison for breaking the GDL, but I guess your GDL is not the same as ours!

Most people tend to be searching something to do with the GDL or BVC.

Someone even searched for 'Overwhelmed by the BVC'. (Was that you again Bar Boy?)

If you visit, please feel free to email me. I did the GDL, so if you didn't get all of your questions answered, just email me. The address is up by Sid the Squirrel. The person wondering about being a mature student on the GDL, I did it. I can probably answer whatever your question may have been. I would love to help. I remember trying to find out stuff before I began the GDL, and BVC for that matter, and really struggled to find out what I wanted.

For the person searching for 'protracter', I suppose you didn't find what you were looking for. My post on 'Draughting' obviously caught your search, but if you can spell protractor correctly you would do better! Still, in the spirit of helpfulness, I have left you a picture at the top of this post.

So all you visitors, send me an email, post comments, slag me off, have a laugh. Just don't slip in, and slip out never to be heard of again.



Bar Boy said...

I was the one Boolean searching for a supply of hard drugs.

The Penguin said...

Nice jokes, best of luck with becoming a Legal Eagle.

Question - would you accept a brief to defend the lovely scum who murdered Peter Connolly?

Best wishes
The Penguin

Swiss Tony said...

Hey Penguin, thanks. I like your blog by the way.

Taking a personal view of the scum, no, I couldn't.

Taking a professional view, a barrister has no choice as to the case he is given. It avoids people that do henious crimes being unable to find someone to represent them. If the client tells you they are guilty, then you go with that and cannot claim to the court that they are innocent. If they claim they are innocent, then it is the responsibility of the prosecution to prove that they are guilty.

Of the 3 scum, which one killed him? Could any of them claim to have been innocent? The press witch hunt says no, they are all scum, but does the press often/ever tell the truth?

So, a barrister will take the case, advance any defences given to it by the scum, and the prosecution does all it can to establish that they did kill him.

Where things will go wrong is that it has to be proven beyond all reasonable doubt that one, two or three of them killed him. If they all blame each other, and the forensics can't show which one did it, then they will get away with it. The jury system sucks, although the chances are that all three will be found guilty by any jury. Worst of all, the three of them will be on legal aid, and the legal team will become very rich indeed by the end, thereby gaining a bad name for what is in essence an honest and hardworking professional just doing his job.

i am sure that if you ask any legal professional, personally they would advocate stringing all three up by the balls (Difficult with the mother I admit) and slitting their throats.


Law Minx said...

My dear Swizz,

A sage comment indeed with respect to the professional v personal tensions a barrister is subject to on an almost daily basis- pointedly put, If I may say so, particularly with respect to poor wretched liitle baby P such that I am in entire agreement with your personal sentiments. As a Midwife I TIRED of arguing with the pompus politically correct jobsworth socials with respect to care, and this case makes me sick to my stomach. I dont, and never will, trust social workers. EVER.

Swiss Tony said...

Minxy, my last contact with a social worker, was when i turned up at Romford County Court with a guy who wanted to see his kids.

The Social Worker had said in her report 'He has been prevented from seeing his children for 3 months and should be able to accept that situation by now'

The poor guy pointed out that the social worker had recently had a baby, and he wondered if he took it from her, just how long it would take her to accept the fact that she couldn't see it.

Interestingly, it was that case which went completely tits up in court and made me decide to see just how difficult it would be to qualify and then I could speak on behalf of those unable to speak clearly, sensibly, or english.

I should have pointed out to P.p.p.p.penguin, that I have no intention of ever doing criminal law. One good reason is I can't see how I would be able to act professionally with a client that I think needs to be strung up... etc etc.

It also helped me to realise that I didn't want to do Family Law, because having managed to get him to see his kids, he felt it was too little, too late, and he was emigrating to Australia instead.

He also admitted to me that he had bought a gun and would have shot his ex-wife, but decided to emigrate instead.

Are there any areas of law which don't involve dealing with people? Blimey, people are weird.


Bar Boy said...

Am not sure about the comment on being able to blame each other and, therefore, get off. Wasn't the law changed in this respect a few years back to avoid that happening ? (says BB, the worst crim law student on the planet; in which case, the change might just be a figment of my imagination).

Also, I doubt very much that any LSC funded lawyer will get rich on the case. And, even if they did, who would begrudge them some spoils for having to put up with dealing with such scum.

Swiss Tony said...

BB, I was thinking that they would get away with murder and admit guilt for manslaughter.

The mother will claim to be terrorised by the 2 men. One of them will blame the other. The third will claim to have never seen the child. And so the merry go round will carry on. How can anyone prove the fatal blow?

And the lawyers would do the case, an appeal, and then off to the jolly old European Courts, with Human Rights infringements etc etc. It will roll and roll.

Lost said...

I know how you feel, all these people looking at your site but no-one emailing you!

I get the majority of my page visits from people who have got done from fare evasion, I don't normally even get a thank you for the help I have given them!

barmaid said...

Yes, I can see that unlike the criminal courts, the civil courts are full of fine upstanding individuals who have just had a raw deal out of life and representing them in court each day will be an absolute pleasure and will in no way question your ethics, morality or belief in the fact that justice will always prevail.

Each and every case will of course be a worthy and meritorious and in no way will question just why we embarked on a career in the legal system in the first place. The (perhaps) more than ample fee paid will not sit uncomfortably in our high interest accounts, but will gently rest there as a reminder of what a fine job we did in ensuring that the scales of justice tipped predictably, once again in favour of that fine upstanding client, his tailored suit and expensive cologne worn as a symbol for all to see that he is nothing at all like his counterparts appearing before the crown court.

Android said...

Sid the Squirrel - I like that. ;D

In relation to the criminal barrister fees, I thought I'd throw my 50p in. I know how everyone's different blah blah, but a junior provincial Barrister (i.e. not QC, out of London/out of Manchester) with 20 yrs experience said that he got paid £250K for a 6 months trial last year. So I suppose the moral of that story is that if you are dedicated enough... ;D

Anonymous said...

Argh that sidebar is terrifying!

Feels like you're watching me...

pigogyn said...

Owite Swiss me old mucker? I'm doing me first mini-pupillage this week and been to 2 trials - one Crown and one County, and they were both adjourned. Was never like that on Crown Court! Never heard anyone say: I put it you...

Swiss Tony said...

Rock'n Roll, having been informed on good authority by an expert, Bar Boy, apparently the location tells me where the nearest internet server is. Anyone viewing from London shows as Grays, Thurrock! So you are quite safe.

If you knew me better, you would have also known that I only look at the pretty flags anyway.

Piggy, Hi,and welcome. My last Mini comprised being asked to write an opinion when I had no idea how to do one. I did make a list of points I thought were relevant, suggesting that the claimant was a nutter and wasting his time. Having handed that across I fled the scene.

I then did a Criminal trial which the guy pleaded guilty so the day became just an hour or so.

The rest of the week I spent sitting in the waiting room for the clerk to tell me what to do, and despite regular promises that he would get me something REALLY interesting, after keeping me waiting for 2 hours he would tell me to go ad have an early lunch, or go home, but be back tomorrow because I WILL have something REALLY interesting to do.

On the Friday I didn't bother going in.

Look upon it as just a part of the training!

And apply for other Minis too.

Anyway, glad you made yourself known.


pigogyn said...

what a coincidence! I went in today to be told that i would be going to a 3 day criminal trial and my young barrister would pick me up on the way...half an hour later a clerk told me that my mentor had forgotten to collect me (again!) and that I should go straight to court myself and meet him there. Despite the tempting allure of a full-blown 3 day trial, what happened was that the defendant pleaded guilty to about 90% of the allegations and after a morning of negotiations, the hearing lasted a few mins and the miscreant was admonished and given a conditional discharge. However, despite the lack of courtoom drama (except for the effective use of a long pause by the defendant before pelading "guilty" - very TV drama!), it was good experience in seeing how both sides negotiated and how the barrister interacted with the complainants. So, another early finish! I find all the sitting arounde exhausting. I wonder what tomorrow will have in store?! Something REALLY interesting I hope...

Swiss Tony said...

Hey Pigsy, what is it with these scoundrels that commit crimes and then plead guilty. How dare they. Don't they know that we want entertainment!

Fingers crossed you do get something interesting today. I found Minis very exhausting too.

What stage in your training have you got to?

On the matter of finding your barrister at the court, when I did that I spoke to her the evening before, knew what she looked like, but then when I arrived at court there were three barristers, all wigged up, and I couldn't for the life of me tell which one she was!


pigogyn said...

Yeah! What is it with these people? Deny everything for months on end and as soon as they see some scary people in wigs and black robes they want to admit everything and more. Today was even worse. I wasn't even given a wig to shadow so I sat all on my own for hours on end in cold courtroom while lots of people scooted to and fro for hours on end, and when the thing actually got started, the crim pleaded guilty to a lesser offence and we all went to lunch. Chambers had nothing for me in the afternoon so I went home and watched Judge Judy.
I'm in an inbetween year at the mo. Did my GDL this summer and a little place called De Montfort University. You may have heard of it. And intending to do the BVC next September. So this year I'm cramming it full of experience - well, trying anyway!

Swiss Tony said...

Pigsy, I think that there should be a new rule, that pleas cannot be changed if a mini is in the room. They should have more respect.

Send me a mail on swisstony24@yahoo.com as I might be able to give you some advice about the BVC and where to apply