Tuesday, 21 April 2009

Made to make your mouth water!!!

There is a rumour going around that the Pupillage Portal will be renamed after this round of applications to the Starburst Portal.

Why can't they just leave things alone.

Well, I am not mentioning the word, but I am done with it. I have chewed, tried all flavours, removed that little bit of paper that always managed to stick to the sweet and only revealed itself after a bit of chewing, and am not going back for a month or so.

Good or bad, Swizzy has done his bit. If they can't see the benefits of having me on their team, then sod them. In fact, before they reject me sod them anyway. Nah nah nah nah nah, I got in first.

Back to my day job in ASDA, and I am once again, saying nuffink.

Jobs a good'un



Bar Boy said...

Swiss, Asda ? What happened, did they kick you off the bins ?

barmaid said...

BB, haven't you cottoned on who Swizzle is yet? He's that bloke in the high viz who collects all the supermarket trolleys, ends up with a line of em about half a mile long, which he keeps scraping down the side of my Reliant Robin. Last time I went shopping I had to park it the other way round so he would scrape the other side, saved me a fortune on self-adhesive, go faster stripes.

Law Minx said...

SWISS!! I thought you worked in the Deli at WAITROSE! Has the Herculean Effort involved in shoving your Application through Stargate mean that it has come to to such an Impasse, such a DENOUMENT?! Enquiring minds want to know!!!

Swiss Tony said...

I will admit to being in charge of trollies, but at Easter I was promoted. All you lot taking the Mick out of me, and I was the one that gained promotion and a new job.

Meeter and greeter. I am the one announcing the little boy lost in aisle 2 crying for his mummy (Its usually barboy and I think his mum does it on purpose) and I also announce the special offers on peas, chips, fish fingers and other delightful 5-a-day necessities.

I also have a very big badge with SWIZZ on it. If Olpas Fruit comes through for me I will wear it to any interviews I get.

BM, sorry about your car. I liked the way you parked it in that hedge though. Very artistic.

LM, I was fired from Waitrose for putting my **** in the bacon slicer. (Oh the joke is so old I can't be bothered). I moved to ASDA because the uniform suits my skin colour. (Its all those peas I eat)


Law Minx said...

My Dear Swiss,

While I am DEEPLY sorry to hear of your truly UNFORTUNATE inccident with the Bacon Slicer, I am almost too afraid to enquire as to that which was used, -in such a situation of crisis and EMERGENCY- as a replacement........!!

Mel said...

I'm afraid adverse inferences may be drawn from your silence, Mr Swiss.

Long as you don't go to Tesco, you're alright with me. Waitrose- staff are friendly and knowledgeable. Asda I don't go to much, but they seem friendly in my nearest. Sainsbury's do try, but you need 4 people before you can find the bulgar wheat.

At my 24 hour Tescos, you'll be lucky if the mouth-breathers there let you escape alive with a pint of milk and some day old bread.

Swiss Tony said...

Mel, my silence is more to do with not wishing to repeat one of the oldest jokes in the world!

Bulgar Rice? Whats wrong with Mr Bens? Why does every posting you ever make end up talking about food?